so they say, "nothing's gonna happen if you stay there and feel sorry for yourself..."
and so how should i continue? have i already reached my threshold? how about heightening it? or maybe perhaps i should just walk blindly? kinda like eenie meenie miniee moo? god, how...? another huge question mark just bestow on me. uncertainties? definitely, im having one of those, too. just so you know, i have absolutely no idea how to continue. and i mean absolutely no, idea.
everyday i wakeup, rushing. get dressed, brush up.. head out.. i dont even know what im pursuing or what im rushing for.. what have i found out during these 3 weeks? frankly speaking, afew night visits from loneliness, some noise from friends, few moments of family laughs, truckloads of personal time(mostly spend on swimming, making accessories, etc..) and that's that. oh, maybe some late nights out without having to worry i might worry people, too. but does that tells me anything or any answers that ive been looking for? nope, never. none at all. a big fat ass zero.
im anxious, and im clueless.. i feel sorry, that we're in misery.. but how do we deal with this? it's not yet another emo day, it's just things that we, or maybe i, have to conclude asap. Dragging doesnt help.. no, it so doesnt help. at all. we're in pain.
so tell me, what should i do? a simple question that takes bloody long to answer.. and yet, another inconclusive day. god, help. help us. help, me.
sigh, one of the saddest part of life is keeping yourself busy pushing yourself to the limit... and when you get home, lying in bed... you'll discover that after what you've all done to forget, you're still in that very same position you're trying to escape...
jess.
everyday i wakeup, rushing. get dressed, brush up.. head out.. i dont even know what im pursuing or what im rushing for.. what have i found out during these 3 weeks? frankly speaking, afew night visits from loneliness, some noise from friends, few moments of family laughs, truckloads of personal time(mostly spend on swimming, making accessories, etc..) and that's that. oh, maybe some late nights out without having to worry i might worry people, too. but does that tells me anything or any answers that ive been looking for? nope, never. none at all. a big fat ass zero.
im anxious, and im clueless.. i feel sorry, that we're in misery.. but how do we deal with this? it's not yet another emo day, it's just things that we, or maybe i, have to conclude asap. Dragging doesnt help.. no, it so doesnt help. at all. we're in pain.
so tell me, what should i do? a simple question that takes bloody long to answer.. and yet, another inconclusive day. god, help. help us. help, me.
sigh, one of the saddest part of life is keeping yourself busy pushing yourself to the limit... and when you get home, lying in bed... you'll discover that after what you've all done to forget, you're still in that very same position you're trying to escape...
jess.
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