thoughts on a Saturday

some times there is alot of why in my head and i wanna just keep finding out and keep asking. But then again i often wonder if i really do want to know at all. and what happens after i know it? And when i know, i often regret knowing it.

life oh life. humans of humans. emotions oh emotions. what shall we do with you?

We are always constantly changing, and what we morphed into, or rebirth due to realization, is just another part where we have yet to explore. We change, yes we do. But what about our hearts? I guess by observing and experiencing it myself, they do.

and that sucks.

its a very peaceful Saturday, and its so nice to have a peaceful day. Its been a long long while since i last had such luxury. and its so endearing, so precious to me. but that aside, I have big plans for my big dream. and i want it to happen so i will make it happen. some things can be achieve if you're determine to. and these things are things, not people. people are tacky, feelings are tacky, & it makes me fall hard. endless tears, the heartache that ll make you feel as if you're just better off dead.. oh my my, what have i done to my silly heart? its a brand new year, its time to heal.

today my mommy say, you should settle down soon. & then i told her....

"to who?"

and i smiled to myself, trying to hide the ache that reignited.

jess.